


Old Friends

by inspiration_assaulted



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Brief drunk John, Caring Mycroft, Epistolary, M/M, Mycroft To The Rescue, Pining, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-03
Updated: 2014-04-03
Packaged: 2018-01-18 00:21:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1408060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inspiration_assaulted/pseuds/inspiration_assaulted
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which John and Mycroft are old friends, and Mycroft texts</p>
            </blockquote>





	Old Friends

I see he’s left you behind already –MH

Christ, have I just agreed to move in with your little brother? –JW

I’m afraid so, John. I’m also afraid there is no chance of you getting a cab. Shall I send a car? –MH

Will you be in the car? –JW

I may –MH

If you must, then –JW

* * *

 

I can’t get a hold of Lestrade. The cabbie’s the killer and Sherlock’s just gone off with him –JW

Lestrade is being dispatched to your location now –MH

Use the gun if you must –MH

…

He’s right. Good shot –MH

* * *

 

I hesitate to ever place domestic bliss and Sherlock within the same sentence, but the two seem to coexist around you, John –MH

Good morning to you too, Mycroft. You know I don’t have higher language skills in the morning –JW

How is life with Sherlock? –MH

You know, I used to think you were just exaggerating about him –JW

And now? –MH

He keeps thumbs in the crisper and talks to a skull. I’m never bored –JW

Obviously something must be boring you, or you would not have sought out a job –MH

John? –MH

…

I’m low on money, alright? –JW

And no, I don’t want any of yours –JW

You and Sherlock should combine your accounts. You are much more likely to manage them responsibly –MH

Yes, and why don’t we just get married while we’re at it? –JW

No. I’ve got a job now, so it’s fine. It’s all fine –JW

* * *

 

I am pleased to hear you are all right, John –MH

Jesus, is there every anything you don’t know? –JW

Only the unimportant things. No lasting damage from your concussion? –MH

No. Does he usually get abducted on his cases? –JW

No, Sherlock is usually smarter than his opponents –MH

Right, so it’s just a stupid person thing, getting kidnapped –JW

You are many things, John, but you are not stupid, despite what my brother might say under the influence of boredom –MH

* * *

 

John, I am in need of assistance –MH

Good God, why are you talking to me then? –JW

Be serious, John. I need…advice of a sort that for which one would usually seek out a ‘best mate’ –MH

Mycroft Holmes, do you need love advice? –JW

…

You’re laughing –MH

I am. Hysterically –JW

Stop it –MH

Stop looking at the camera feeds then. I know you’ve got some in here –JW

…

Are you done? –MH

Yes. I can be serious now –JW

How would I go about appearing less…unsociable? –MH

Less like yourself, you mean? –JW

If you wish to put it that way, yes –MH

You don’t –JW

That rather defeats the point of the exercise, John –MH

No, that’s not what I mean. You don’t bother to be any less like yourself, because that always ends badly. You are Mycroft Holmes, King of Britain, and you act like him, and anybody worth your attention will like that –JW

Trust me, no one who wants to change you will ever be satisfied. It just becomes a vicious cycle –JW

Though perhaps don’t admit that you watch the CCTV feeds on your first date –JW

Very well. Thank you, John –MH

Just out of curiosity, who has finally piqued the interest of His Majesty? –JW

…

DI Lestrade –MH

GREG?! -JW

I occupy a minor position in the government. I am not the ‘King of Britain’ –MH

Yes you are. Greg, really? –JW

Yes, really –MH

I suppose he is rather handsome, isn’t he? –JW

Indeed –MH

And he has practice dealing with a Holmes! –JW

Shut up –MH

* * *

 

Any reason Greg went beet red when I mentioned your name today? –JW

Don’t worry, Sherlock wasn’t around to see it –JW

Greg and I may have a date this weekend, if that is what you are enquiring about –MH

And thank you for keeping Sherlock out of it –MH

Good on you, mate! Try to curb your Bond villain tendencies, Greg probably won’t enjoy dinner for two in an abandoned warehouse –JW

…

Mycroft? –JW

…

You better tell me all the gory details! –JW

* * *

 

John, are you all right? –MH

…

John, I can’t leave. Just tell me you are all right –MH

…

John? –MH

…

…

…

I don’t care how many security protocols it breaks, tell me you have that bastard –JW

…

We have him –MH

…

…

I’m fine -JW

* * *

 

How’re you today, Mycroft? –JW

Well –MH

And how’s the government? –JW

Fiscally stable, at the moment –MH

And how’s Greg? –JW

This has been a set-up, hasn’t it? –MH

Maaayyybe –JW

Greg is also well, thank you –MH

Is he? Of course, I only ask because I was at a crime scene today, and I happened to notice that good old Greg had a rather prominent…contusion on his neck, of the sort received from extended suction and maybe a little blunt pressure –JW

Of course, as a medical professional, I feel obligated to make sure such a…contusion isn’t a symptom of a larger medical condition –JW

…

Greg is also well, thank you –MH

Mycroft, you sucked on his neck like a horny teenager! –JW

I told him to wear a scarf! –MH

 

“John, what are you laughing at?”

“Nothing, Sherlock!”

* * *

 

Mycroft, I need your help –JW

Oh dear, have you gotten another ASBO? –MH

No. Thanks for clearing up the last one, though –JW

You’re quite welcome. What do you need my assistance for then? –MH

You are rather resistant to asking me for help, usually –MH

Well, in this case you’re the only one who can help me –JW

Is this a ‘best mate’ sort of advice-seeking? –MH

No offence, but I wouldn’t chose to ask you for normal dating advice –JW

John, do stop being so obtuse. What has made you seek out my very particular advice? –MH

Sherlock –JW

To the best of my very considerable knowledge, Sherlock has not gotten himself into any trouble, so I must ask: what about Sherlock? –MH

You know, I used to think you were both loners, pretty much. The kind of people that don’t fall in love. I mean, I never saw you show any interest in anyone for years –JW

And Sherlock’s convinced that relationships aren’t his ‘area’ and he’s ‘married to his work’, just like I always thought about you, but now you’ve got Greg and you two are like teenagers with each other, and I just wonder if maybe I was wrong? –JW

Do you think Sherlock could…fall in love? –JW

…

Oh dear –MH

Mycroft? –JW

I’ll send a car –MH

* * *

 

He’s now wandering about the flat in a sheet. I’m about to spontaneously combust from sexual tension –JW

I suppose I needn’t ask what your intentions toward my brother are, then –MH

My intentions involve throwing that pale bastard onto a bed and very little clothes –JW

I’ll be a perfect gentleman about it, though –JW

Pleasepleaseplease give him a case that requires clothes –JW

…

A DI Carter will call momentarily –MH

* * *

 

Sherlock has finally found the one person capable of making him care –JW

Good, shall I start searching for your wedding gift now? –MH

It’s The Woman -JW

Oh. Not good –MH

Bit not good, yeah –JW

I’ve heard 38 of those bloody orgasmic text alert noises so far –JW

I don’t know what I can do, John –MH

You can get me the hell out of here before I hear another one –JW

He stops whatever he’s doing to look at them too –JW

I’ll send a car. Pack a bag, you can stay at mine tonight –MH

 

 

Why have you abducted John for the night? –SH

He asked me to –MH

Yes, but why? –SH

Who can know what truly goes on in John Watson’s heart? –MH

His heart? The expression is his ‘mind,’ what’s his heart have to do with anything? –SH

Take care, brother dear –MH

 

 

All the body parts in the fridge are labelled and properly stored –SH

I know that –JW

I don’t think I’ve said anything that would make you very angry –SH

No, you haven’t –JW

Then why have you left? Why go to Mycroft of all people? –SH

Because Mycroft and I are old friends, and I can always count on him to help me –JW

But why did you leave? What’s happened? –SH

That, I don’t have to answer –JW

John! –SH

Goodnight, Sherlock –JW

* * *

 

Danger night –MH

I’ll start the search –JW

Your insipid girlfriend will be upset –MH

That’s fine. She’s insipid anyway –JW

* * *

 

Why on earth do you need eight stiches and a brace for your hand? –MH

Sherlock woke me up with another one of his fucking mourning songs for her -JW

I punched a wall. Transfer some of my money into Mrs Hudson’s account to pay for fixing the holes, would you? –JW

Holes, plural? –MH

Yes –JW

Don’t bother going home. A car will wait outside. Greg will fetch what you need for tomorrow –MH

…

Might make it several days, actually –JW

However long you need –MH

 

 

I’m being interrogated. Is this what terrorists feel like? –GL

No. Sherlock is much worse –MH

John’s a bloody saint, then –GL

A better man could not be found –MH

You could almost think he cares about John, if you didn’t know him –GL

But we do know him, far too well. Even familial affection does not blind me to the fact that Sherlock will never be worth John’s regard –MH

Poor bastard –GL

 

 

Why do you keep leaving? –SH

Because leaving is better than staying sometimes –JW

* * *

 

Should I try to find another insipid girlfriend? –JW

Even you recognise that they are insipid… -MH

Trying to hard? –JW

A bit, yes –MH

* * *

 

Mycroft is being the government again. Bond marathon? –GL

Are we going to eat popcorn and stay up all night gossiping like teenage girls? –JW

Well, I’ve got work tomorrow, so it’ll probably be beer and chips and pass out on the couch by 11 –GL

Sounds perfect –JW

* * *

 

I worry about you, John. I wish you wouldn’t walk around London so late –MH

It’s walks or his composing –JW

…

Take the gun with you next time –MH

* * *

 

Have I done something to John? –SH

It isn’t my place to say –MH

You don’t respect boundaries! According to you, it’s always your place to say! –SH

This isn’t –MH

...

I don’t understand –SH

None of us do, Sherlock. It is something that cannot be understood –MH

 

 

John is avoiding me and I don’t know why –SH

Oh, have you finally pulled your head out of your arse and noticed? It’s about time –GL

What? –SH

Nothing, he’s just been avoiding you since, oh, about the time you took the Adler case –GL

Oh –SH

He doesn’t like her –SH

That’s part of it, yeah –GL

Then what’s the rest of it? –SH

It’s not my place to say –GL

WHY IS IT NO ONE’S PLACE?! –SH

* * *

 

Did you send a car? –JW

No… -MH

Anthea’s here too –JW

I trust you’ll be safe then. If not, no one will ever see her again –MH

Right then, guess I see what she’s up to –JW

…

What is it? –MH

…

She’s alive –JW

…

I had suspected. I had hoped not, but I suspected –MH

I’m sorry –MH

* * *

 

She’s in the fucking flat –JW

Pint? –GL

Please –JW

 

 

Did you take John again? –SH

I took pity on John –GL

It took you this long to notice? –GL

…I was in my mind palace –SH

Has Adler left? –GL

No. What does it matter? –SH

John won’t be back for a while, then –GL

 

 

Sherlock will be back soon. Adler is out of the picture –MH

K –JW

He never loved her, John –MH

He doesnt lovw anyine –JW

Are you intoxicated? –MH

no jusr drunk –JW

 

 

You sent him back drunk?! –MH

You said Sherlock was out! –GL

I figured he would be asleep before Sherlock got back! –GL

Is this bad? –GL

It could be. We’ll have to see –MH

* * *

 

I hesitate to ask how you are this morning –MH

I don’t know. My hangover’s shit though –JW

I’m not even sure I want to know if I did anything questionable –JW

Greg wishes you to know that he is there in spirit –MH

Ta, both of you. Have a coffee on me –JW

Cheers –MH

 

 

I must have said something. He’s avoiding eye contact –JW

Did you confess your affection to him? –MH

Christ, you make me sound like Jane Austen novel –JW

I’m afraid to ask –JW

Stiff upper lip, Captain –MH

Yes, thank you, your Majesty –JW

Sarcasm is unattractive, John –MH

Do you even hear yourself? Sarcasm is the Holmes mother tongue –JW

* * *

 

You’ve sent Greg –JW

I have –MH

…

Thank you –JW

Enjoy Dartmoor –MH

I just might –JW

 

 

Are they all right? –MH

I don’t think so. Something happened, but I don’t know what –GL

Oh dear –MH

Yeah -GL

* * *

 

Did you give Sherlock a case? –JW

No –GL

Check with Mycroft –GL

 

 

Did you give Sherlock a case? –JW

No –MH

Did you ask Greg? –MH

He didn’t either, I asked him first –JW

What is he doing? –MH

I’m not sure. He’s really jumpy around me. And secretive –JW

It’s not drugs, I checked –JW

I’m afraid I don’t know –MH

…

…

Have you figured it out? –MH

 

 

I’ve got a double homicide case, missing murder weapon. Interested? –GL

Can’t. I have a date –SH

* * *

 

So… -JW

YES?! –MH

Sherlock had a date. Please tell me it was you! –MH

Yes it was –JW

Now can I make the happy announcement joke? –MH

Yes, you can –JW

But maybe not around Mrs Hudson –JW

 

 

Good on you, mate –GL

Cheers! –JW

 

 

About time, Sherlock, about time –GL

I have been enormously stupid, haven’t I? –SH

You have. But at least you got there –GL

 

 

John Watson is far too good for you –MH

I know –SH

It’s all rather miraculous, isn’t it? –SH

Don’t hurt him. A message from both me and Greg –MH

Shouldn’t you be threatening John, as my older brother? –SH

We are only brothers. John and I are old friends -MH


End file.
